In Case You’re Wondering.
I don’t have an explanation for what I’m about to write. I think I just want to write it down. I’m just so freaking sad. I’m paranoid. Nervous. Sunken down deeper in the hole than I’ve ever been. The feeling literally steals my happiness. Andrew and I just bought our first house, we close in one day. What should be such an exciting time in our lives - is overshadowed by the dark cloud that looms over me. Looking back at what was poised to be the happiest day of my life, the birth of my son; I had just been given the worst news of my life. I can’t help but think that same thing will happen again. I can’t be allowed these wonderful blessings, can I? My brain tells me: Cancer will sneak in, and steal everything and everyone I love. It will take me away. From my son, my husband, my mom, my sister. They will live and move on and my life will have been for nothing. My son won’t even remember my face, how much I love him and prayed for him. Doesn’t this s...